American Idol 6: Why the Good News is the Bad News

It is not an exaggeration to think of American Idol as America’s new favorite pastime. There was a time when football wives conceded that while they lost their hubbies to the games on Sundays, that the roads were less crowded, at least. One could go to the grocery store or the mall without facing the usual weekend hoards.

That same thing has become true for American Idol. I have friends who actually wait until American Idol is on to go grocery shopping. The stores are deserted (and one friend assures me that most of the cashiers are in the break room… watching Idol). Meanwhile, those friends do their shopping and return home and plunk on the Tivo. Yep, they watch Idol without commercial interruption.

The reason all this is even possible is because American Idol is posting staggering ratings numbers. The premiere of season 6 came within a hair of matching the Ruben/Clay finale of season 2! Fox executives are still lighting stogies over their good fortune. For fans of the show, this is great news… and not so great.

You see, in television, there is a prevailing attitude of not fixing what ain’t broke. In other words, as long as the ratings remain so high, there is no reason for American Idol to fine-tune itself. You all know what I’m talking about.

The audition episodes.

Yes, the bad auditions are fun. This year, though, I have to add my voice to the ones who say this season feels especially… mean. I recall last year was supposed to be the mean season. I remember all the forecasting of what the contestants were like in Hollywood, and all the supposed tossing under the bus that we would see. All we saw were the bitchy Brittenum twins.

No, no, this is the mean season! Simon calling someone a “bush baby” (and not referring to the twins) was pretty low. Randy seems to have stopped hiding behind his paper and is just laughing in people’s faces now. Paula… well, she’s fatigued.

Not only that, but the bad auditions seem to be excruciatingly long this season. It only takes a few seconds to know someone sucks. And really, do we have to see the devastation that follows the crucifying comments of the doomed? We seem to be getting a lot of that.

Yes, it is kind of fun to snicker at the delusional in the safety of our living rooms, but we don’t want to see them collapse into the arms of their parents, dreams shattered. That’s no fun at all. It’s just… mean.

And guess what? The ratings being what they are, we can be assured that we will get more of the same until the Hollywood rounds begin. That means clean through February, more than likely. Why? The ratings say the shows are working. Why change anything? The voices of yours and mine saying, “Hey, can we get more good auditions in the mix?” just sound like groundless bellyaching in the context of the ratings gold that has been plumbed.

Yes, it’s true. Idol could slip a few more good auditions in to the mix. In Memphis, 22 singers advanced; we only saw three of them. Or even some mid-level auditions – Ashanti Johnson’s and “Little Shirley”’s auditions are good examples of that. Were they good? Why exactly did they like Ashanti all the way to Hollywood for two years straight and this year toss her out on the first audition? What do the judges’ trained ears hear that ours didn’t? That kind of audience education could be huge! But it’s easier to dumb it down for the masses.

Am I exaggerating? Idol producer Ken Warwick told USA Today, “Like it or don’t like it, people like the bad singers. They really do. And so, you know, asking me as a producer to make a show that people are going to tune into and enjoy, then it’s more the bad singers that will bring the ratings in, especially when you’re on your sixth season and you want the show to be successful.”

And the numbers are bearing him out. There is nothing to make Idol change a thing about the shows they start off with. As far as Idol producers are concerned, it is a formula, and it is a formula that works.

That means there will be plenty of celluloid granted to the Ian Benardos of the world, and less to the Sundance Heads. The answer is, don’t watch… but can we really look away?

Really?

If you haven’t already, be sure to check out these other recent articles on Foxes On Idol:

Sting7 has been a respected published writer for many years, as a music editor, entertainment critic, columnist, and interviewer. He also has a curious love for pro-wrestling! You can email Stinger at stingseven@yahoo.com.

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